Shy Girl Tips

I Know I keep saying I'll do better but is hard to try and keep up with life and a blog and a sex blog that you were supposed to get help with (UGH!) anywhoosie I dear little reader requested (actually two or more have personally emailed me) some tips for not so forward ladies so this one goes to her... and I should try and be a bit more dilligent in my salaciousness

Also feel free in the comment section to request what you want to see or read about and well as to offer your own tips, boys, I'm alo hoping for your input regarding this topic cause at heart shy girls need encouragement, so, if they hear/know/get told they are doing something right, they will want to keep at it!

First of all, I am a firm believer that you don't have to carry on and about like a hoodrat all loud crass and obnoxious or advertising to guys what you will and won't do, in fact let other things speak for you But I also fully believe ladies gotta own themselves and their bodies and their orgasms in and out of the bedroom, so to me shyness is relative i'm all for being introspective, or keep to yourself but I also want women to go as far and as hard and as hot and sexy as is possible with themselves as far as sex goes, cause happy women is what's UP!

Now then, I think that initially with more introverted ladies the thing you want to do is have an honest sit down with yourself about risk assesment cause it'll be easy for someone to just take advantage and you also don't want to fall prey to some sorry bullshit so you can go some ways about this;

The "I want to trust this one with my body and own this ", or the

"I'm going to go against type rock this shit out, enjoy myself one way or the other and damned the rest!"

"Slow tease" approach (and God Bless you if you have the fortitude, I can only do frottage a date or two fuck that!), or

Obviously Nixed (cause he is a dick, cause he wants to hit and leave you be without a good orgasm or foreplay, cause he doesn't inspire lust or trust, so fuck him)

And on that topic you can only answer yourself regards your intentions or the intentions of the dickk carrier, however if you decided to proceed then Balls to the Wall, do what you gonna do and I recommend a little bit of wine while you're at it JUST A LITTLE BIT for some extra liquid courage

So you're going for it there are few things I'm going to start recommending:

Start walking around naked: if you got kids or something get a lock on your door and close the blinds, the point here is YOU need to be comfortable with YOU aware of your body and how it moves and how it feels and how to make it look it's best, extra points if you move on to nothing but heels and if you start taking pics of yourself with cute little things on and such then go for it, (DON'T SEND THEM TO ANYONE) causethis is NOT about self loathing or whatever, is about self assessment and self actualization and all that good shit

Masturbate: I've said this before but it bears repeating... why would you expect someone to make you happy if you can't make you happy??Learn what you like, girlfriend!? Porn, hands, toys whatever you want, I'd start with my hand, move on to a vibe cause I'm not a dildo chick and NEVER EVER EVER underestimate the power of a hot bath or the showerhead going to all the right tasty places. also the more you stimulate yourself, the more you'd want some

Read you some helpful material: Erotica really is a girls's best friend, not that bullshit where Fabio is on the cover or Zane shit, no I mean Real Erotica

Also Know this: DUH! He WANTS YOU hussy?!!??!? in some way form or capacity, be empowered by this and keep your head about you, his is important knowledge and power which you shouldn't cede in exchange for cock

Speak Up: Not in a bedroom setting but it'd be nice to speak on what you'd like a fantasy you would like to make happen in a regular setting and sort of let that hang in there for a minute, don't do it just to titillate but be real on what you want cause I've noticed some dudes get dickish if you play the stupid game of "acting" like you're a certain way to reel them in and then you are completely different, be it freakier and more wild or completely the opposite and extra tame, so I don't advise that you go above and beyond who YOU are but if you are goingto do it, do it big or go home!. So over drinks, or a nice dinner or a little risque movie such as Lust, Caution (new fave) or Secretary (old Fave) you might want to say Hmm I'd like something like that to happen to me, purr it up ladies!

During foreplay/sex, compliments PLEASE: This is good if you are trying to get together regarding sexual styles and also to guide them cause men are nothing if not utterly..um.... stupid?? when it cmes to reading minds?? also remember that for us vaginal sex is NOT paramount nor what would make most women blast off, but for them the feeling of entering us is so off the charts that they couldn't possibly believe that we are not as utterly melting in the sea of being utterly turned on

Activity tips: You can pick and choose depending on your comfort level but I would really encourage you to try any or all of them because is what would make your experience unforgettable and freeing!

RELAX It's just sex not rocket science!, People that don't want to give sex it's due levity and it's place as a pressure reliever, and a FUN thing kill me, play some music, maybe the wine comes in at this point? ( I have a Notorious sex playlist!, long, slong, sexy, Spanish music, Sade, flamenco, jazz, french music...the works)

Leave the lights on: Why not! you got comfy with your bod for a reason, No?? also how would you showcase pretty undies? if the light is too harsh maybe use some scarves??? I personally like my room kin of on the dark side, like dark wood, big cushy comforter and such, smelling nice but the llight always has to be soft and on, this one hot Turkish dude not only ate my ass after giving me head forever but when I was going to make the lights off move he said: NO leave them on This has to be enjoyed with all the senses!... Yes Honey, God Bless you

During the BJ, or while riding up top Lock eyes: Doesn't have to be long or doing anything too cheesy other than producing a satisfied smirk, but a little eye contact shows "I'm not afraid of this and I'll TOTALLY enjoy myself!" and guys always tell me watching me watching them do the damned thing only revs them up more.. .this goes a bit into the "fake it til you make it" thing, if you don't act the part thoroughly you won't be comfortable in it, is kind of like in a shitty day I wear makeup, a matching underwear set, hot heels and I say: I'm going to be fabulous today! like a mantra, then everyone tells you how fab you look and Tah dah! it's done!

You see how much I cuss?? Time to dirty talk!: Work yourself for it and I promise you It can be a good release!! Look: a "fuck me" can go a long way... an easier way would be descriptive sex talk: "I like how your _____ (use the best term for you, I'm a cock, chick) feels in my pussy", you catch my drift!...

but listen, real talk: In lieu of that I'll take much sooner you not TALKING THE TALKING but SHOWING HIM what's it going to be!


Get to it! The homework is to take care of you first, parade around a little nude and then try the rest as it comes

Mutual Masturbation

I Think this could CERTAINLY be a BIGGGGGG fun inducer and also a delicious thing to do for intimate contact when you are not all necessarily in the mood or can't (Hear me up Ladies, when indisposed I will CATEGORICALLY not avoid contact: I will Make out, I will fellate til the cows come home, I will pull out the oils and get on my naked sensual massage tip but basically I Don't like saying no)


And DUH!! is a GREAT a idea for those folks that need to loosen up or LEARN that makes their partners tick

So your Guide goes as follows:

Know yourself: this is not even so much for the boys as it is for the girls; It's 2009 you SHOULD know your body ABUNDANTLY Well. Besides, a good before-bed Orgasm WILL make you sleep so much better; and sorry to digress but I have this thing where I Firmly believe girls should be allowed to explore themselves and their bodies from a young age... it sure kept me from going at it too young (lost it a few months before my 21 bday BY CHOICE) cause there was NOTHING a boy could do to please me that I couldn't do on my own!.

I've maintained for a very long time that should I procreate and have girls They WILL get their own vibe to sate and satisfy all their curiosity from ME the person that loves them the most, I will explain all the facts I will give them their little privacy why? cause we DO as adults (and I've seen it in my own family) turn the motherfucking blind eye when boys start masturbating every single second they get... so why shouldn't girls get the same leeway to please and know themselves? cause they don't have body parts that stick out?? Miss me with that shit! Maybe if we encourage young women to know themselves we would miss out on many a teenage pregnancy or these lame ass "rainbow parties" (Ugh That shit is utterly despicable) , and a lot less repressed chicks


Don't make it private: Yeah usually masturbating is an "alone" activity, start venturing on masturbating in front of your partner, for a few first times maybe don't quickly proceed to touch each other but see how your partner pleasures Him/herself, take it in, enjoy the view, look him her in the eye and if you're so.very.damned shy then maybe pull out the blindfold and go to town!


Now Try him/her: This is where the fun begins! once you've seen what they like and enjoy the best way to start things up for guys, I'd say during sex, as an extra aid to penetration! That would be soooo sexy and delicious and it'd get her body more attuned and receptive to vaginal penetration (and during anal sex!?!? WHooo lawd!! *fans Self the worst way*) anywhoo Girls, I'd say get him on the shower, while getting dressed, while waiting in line! who cares I'm a NOTORIOUS package rubber and grabber I don't know is a bad habit i nurse and cherish! LOL I'm going to be a dinner and starts rubbing the leg and move up, and if we're seating across from each other... well God Made Toes for That!!!!


Trick it out, Incorporate Toys: Perfect for when you want to experiment and before sex proper!, I mean you are touching each other massaging each other and I think is great to end an intimate massage (the kind that makes your fingers travel a little bit into crevices it shouldn't go into during a normal massage) is to be all oiled up, relaxed, and you start working your partner legs, breast/chest stomach and traveling down below and a little vibe or bullet while masturbating them, before moving on to the big platters (oral/ penetration)

LOVES IT!!
Now get to work cause I'm currently horny!

OOHH ladies Beware AkA a kickass sextoy for the men

AWW shit I've been warning you girlies to be open, do your due diligence and generally put it down in the bedroom, not just speak up and stay being prudish because, much like I tell dudes that don't give head in this day and age THOSE ARE DUMPING GROUNDS

Anyways as science antechnology advances there is less and less of a need of putting up with a bad lay, be it male or female.... Peep this sucker!

REAL TOUCH IS...... A rocket-shaped device "developed and tested by a former NASA engineer" has been being unveiled at the Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas. The gadget has been equipped with belts, lubrication jets, heating elements and other gadgetry programmed to give men the feeling of sex.



http://www.realtouch.com/ ******NOT SAFE FOR WORK***


BUT basically This baby actually syncs to movies online (as In connects, as In Lets you feel all the action in your penis, for example, you are seeing Anal sex: YOu are going to feel ANAL SEX!)

Amazing, non!!

So differently than I've preached to the menfolk, where for us proper foreplay and in some cases a Toy is even needed for a proper orgasm to happen and patience patience patience, this is more of a "shits and giggle" category type of toy for them, or for the, you know, REAL nerdy/needy/lonely/social maladaptive, but a guy in a steady relationship???! he SHOULD be getting all the sex/ stimulation and go for-it-ness from you! (and supplemented by porn wtching and his hand!... look is not that you aren't enough, is that they are greedy) Enthusiastically and practically on cue constantly and deliciously and In good spirits... otherwise why exactly waste each other's time???!

I Mean barring illness and save the few porn obssesed out there most guys wont turn a willing and able warm bodied responsive partner for "play sex" or porn watching, you know??

I mean this toy is a valuable thing for those that can't/don't/won't/ are physically unable to find a partner (cause I can't get over the actual fact you are supposed to feel what you see onscreen!) but real talk ladies, don't shortchange the man in your life that the extreme this is even optional!!! I mean nifty adittion to the Toy chest? YEESSSSS Substitute for your job?? NOoooo

Those answers

Oh Babies I KNOW I'm wrong for waiting but I've been overwhelmed by the daily demands of life

Anyways lets give out them answers non??

Sex Positions Quiz Answers

1-True or False: A great source to learn new sex positions is watching adult videos/pornography.

FALSE; Porn films are to sex education what Hollywood films are to ethics or morality tales. Porn is fake. It may be very sexy fake, but it’s fake nonetheless. The sexual positions used in porn films are chosen not for their likelihood to turn on the actors, or even for the ways that the positions might allow for hot creative sex.

Sex positions in porn are chosen for the way they allow the camera to get wide open access to the genitals (which are still considered the main draw in porn).

While visual porn can be a good place to look for inspiration and ideas, mimicking what you see in porn is not likely to yield very erotic results




2-True or False: Humans are the only animals that engage in sexual intercourse facing each other.

FALSE : Other primates do



3-Which one of these is not a name for a sex position:
a) Reverse Cowgirl b)Dragonfly c) Pile Driver d) Finger Cuffs

DRAGONFLY: The rest have been used to describe sexual positions!




4-The most important element of a great sex position is...

a) The angle of penetration b) The speed of penetration
c) The physical position of the partner being penetrated
d) The rhythm e) All of the above

All of the above; Of course!



5-Which of the following titles is from an actual peer-reviewed academic journal?

a) Let me count the ways: Canonists and theologians contemplate coital positions.
b) Imagine me and you: Sex positions and their relationship to sexual intimacy
c)Why don’t we do it in the road? Coital positioning and the cultural practice of parking.
d)Love hurts: Porcupine copulatory positioning and highway mortality estimates.

Let me count the ways: Canonist and theologians contemplate coital positions.... yes indeed who knew




6-True or False: When you are pregnant you should only have sex in the missionary position.

FALSE!!!!First, we tend to still view pregnancy as a medical condition, and pregnant women as extremely fragile. While there may be health issues and complications with the pregnancy that make certain kinds of sex difficult, for the most part there is no need to treat sex during pregnancy with anything other than common sense, and no reason to treat a healthy pregnant woman as if she were weak or ill. ***** Best believe if I EVER trip and go insane and decide I want t procreate Giving me sex is part of the signed CONTRACT.. all through my pregnancy, mind you!****

Second, we still tend to think about sex as if there is a right way and a wrong way to do it. In this case many of us have this idea that there is one right (or safe) way to have sex during pregnancy. This is not true. There are infinite safe ways to have sex during pregnancy, depending on what kind of sex you want to have. Another problem with this line of thinking is that it is very rigid (no pun intended). Great sex requires a flexibility of thought, and a willingness to try new things when the old ones aren’t working anymore.

As a general rule, a good sex position for pregnant sex is one where:

• both partners are physically comfortable
• the position allows for the kind of sex and physical contact you want to have
• both partners avoid putting pressure on the uterus, or a partner’s full weight on a pregnant belly.

Experts say that women should avoid lying on their back or right side for long periods of time after four months into the pregnancy.

7-According to scientific research on sexual intercourse, during vaginal penetration the penis is usually:

a)Straight b)Curved like a banana c) Boomerang shaped d)Curved like the letter “S”

Boomerang shaped!! Yeah baby to hit all the sweet spots!



8-Men who prefer the rear entry or “doggy style” sex position are also likely to:

a)Have more sexual fantasies
b) Be circumcised
c)Be uncircumcised
d)enjoy Spicy foods

Have more sexual Fantasies: who knew!?

9-The most popular sex position is:

a)Woman on top
b)Man on top (missionary position)
c)Rear entry or doggy style
d)Spooning
e) both a and c

Both Woman on top and Rear Entry: Win-Win everyone, win-win! Hmmmm




10- Which sex position is most likely to result in a urinary tract infection.

a)Missionary position
b)Spooning sex position
c)Rear entry or doggy style sex position
d)Standing sex position
e)None of the above

None: precious!, anyone could get those, some more than others, only thing sexually that could maybe get you in trouble is Vaginal sex right after anal sex... Think about it with common sense. bacteria from your ass in your pussy... no bueno! (as In no condom change cause I'm SURE no assholes here are trying to raw dog anyone in this day an age!!!!... and if you're married WASH YOUR PENIS!!!)


I'm working on another post regarding this crazy sex toy for men... ladies get wih the program cause this could put a few lazy dudes/ men who don't get sexually satisfied with good, giving and game partners out of commission! (but who wants a lazy man in bed??)

FUN TIME! (But It's educational Too!)

And since we just talked about it I got you a Quiz on sex positions.... I'll give you two days to lock in your answers before revealing the correct ones OK!?! Don't cheat mofos:

Sex Positions Quiz

1-True or False: A great source to learn new sex positions is watching adult videos/pornography.


2-True or False: Humans are the only animals that engage in sexual intercourse facing each other.


3-Which one of these is not a name for a sex position:
a) Reverse Cowgirl b)Dragonfly c) Pile Driver d) Finger Cuffs


4-The most important element of a great sex position is...

a) The angle of penetration b) The speed of penetration
c) The physical position of the partner being penetrated
d) The rhythm e) All of the above


5-Which of the following titles is from an actual peer-reviewed academic journal?

a) Let me count the ways: Canonists and theologians contemplate coital positions.
b) Imagine me and you: Sex positions and their relationship to sexual intimacy
c)Why don’t we do it in the road? Coital positioning and the cultural practice of parking.
d)Love hurts: Porcupine copulatory positioning and highway mortality estimates.


6-True or False: When you are pregnant you should only have sex in the missionary position.

7-According to scientific research on sexual intercourse, during vaginal penetration the penis is usually:

a)Straight b)Curved like a banana c) Boomerang shaped d)Curved like the letter “S”


8-Men who prefer the rear entry or “doggy style” sex position are also likely to:

a)Have more sexual fantasies
b) Be circumcised
c)Be uncircumcised
d)enjoy Spicy foods

9-The most popular sex position is:

a)Woman on top
b)Man on top (missionary position)
c)Rear entry or doggy style
d)Spooning
e) both a and c

10- Which sex position is most likely to result in a urinary tract infection.

a)Missionary position
b)Spooning sex position
c)Rear entry or doggy style sex position
d)Standing sex position
e)None of the above

Book Recomendation

I'm going to start doing this cause I Love reading and I like to read EVERYTHING and anything sex related, so I have two for ya'll today

The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities By Dossie Easton:

If you know me you know I get on absolute board with this title; let's be clear deceptiveness, cheating and the such is NOT NEVER going to get a pass around these parts, Be honest with yours even when you have no use/need/want for a monogamous relationship... I wish Dudes would read this book for the single fact that I've never seen a specie that loves some bullshit lying even when they have no reason for it... I think chicks should read it to get a bit loose and less uptight over silly bullshit, I mean Is SEX it should be fun, bubbly and exciting not some angst filled trip, stay safe and cognizant of the who, why why and the how and own your damned sexuality!

As Per review:

"The authors define the term slut as "a person of any gender who has the courage to lead life according to the radical proposition that sex is nice and pleasure is good for you." The term is reclaimed from its usual use as a pejorative and as a simple label for a promiscuous person. Instead, it is used to signify a person who is accepting of their enjoyment of sex and the pleasure of intimacy with others, and chooses to engage and accept these in an ethical and open way — rather than as cheating

The Ethical Slut discusses how to live an active life with multiple concurrent sexual relationships in a fair and honest way. Discussion topics include how to deal with the practical difficulties and opportunities in finding and keeping partners, maintaining relationships with others, and strategies for personal growth.

It contains chapters discussing how consensual non-monogamy is handled in different subcultures such as the gay and lesbian communities, information on handling scheduling, jealousy, communication, conflict in relationships, and etiquette for group encounters."

AND My Fiction pick this month which at the moment is not exactly Erotica , but... shit it actually is!


The Notebooks of Don Rigoberto- Mario Vargas Llosa: I read it in Spanish and I adored it.. this shit was sexy had some incest-ish behavior, and girl on girl and all sorts of sexy mess... this book and it's imagery are not to be fucked with... but I've always maintained that Latin writers are better at pulling this trick sometimes, anyways

Review/Description: From Library Journal
In Elogio de la Madrasta ("In Praise of the Stepmother"), Vargas Llosa took up the erotic novel, introducing the sensual stepmother Do?a Lucrecia and her husband, Don Rigoberto. This is the second part of Elogio. Each night, in order to keep his marriage to Lucrecia from becoming stale, Don Rigoberto conjures erotic fantasies. These musings, which he writes down in his notebooks, transport him in space and time, allowing him to explore subjects ranging from politics to the arts in an eloquent display of language. Vargas Llosa is at the top of his craft, deftly combining wit and style in a work that will delight and captivate readers

Request Time: Woman On Top

A very Dear Reader requested a post (see I BEEN telling you you can do that Y'all!) and as such I intend to deliver:

She requested an In depth discussion of Woman on Top position, which in retrospect is SO Totally easy to understand why, you see, MOVIES would have you believe that the motion is MUCH more different than what it should be, and basically second guess what should be happening in regards to this and, let's be clear It will NOT look like in the goddamned movies! PERIOD

WOMAN ON TOP

Your Basic Stance: Woman sitting on top of her partner facing him/her, with her knees bent and shins on the ground. This position give you , as a lady the control on what you are going to feel and how much of it since your clitoris is open and available for stimulation from hands or a toy.


Kinda like this ^^^^(what You thought I'd get you in trouble, didn't you?! Bwahahah) anyways, this position and what you are going to feel depends largely on the following:

A) How comfortable you're going to get with YOU: guys like to see you having pleasure and being COMFY so this is not the time to worry about how things look; however it IS the time to relax, to let go, arch your back give a great view of your breasts, cup em if you want (me personally I spend too much time caressing THEIR chest to worry about mine LOL)

B) the motion : and here is where I call bullshit in that Is not that FRANTIC bounce-bounce thing as much as it is a slow(then fast) grind back and forth motion which, once you find it as a rhythm you can control from extremely slow to a more frenetic pace. IF you are a fucking gymnast savant strong leg muscles chick or have supportive headrest or a SOLID firm surface then BY ALL means do as if you were in a deeeeepppppp squat and go for it, THAT would be more in line with the Bouncing Myth which allows deeper penetration, be warned though This will make you VERY tired very quick (oh and if you see the dummies... his legs kind of raised like that does help plenty and make for a different feeling as well)

C) His Natural Curvature: which also gives you an Idea of how you want to move depending on how you're feeling him

D) And tricking it out: as such my favorite moves here

* Guide his hand to GRAB your buttcheeks: trust this is just not Hot But also a good
aid on your Orgasm quest

* For smaller guys and bigger feeling: Put your legs on the inside of his:
which would have you more or less mimic the regular man on top missionary
(at least visually) makes you feel it deeper and is a good role reversal

* Ballin': Sometimes (depending on your guy and how nasty we shall get here)
you will wet your hand with your own saliva(trust me just do it) ...lick your hand
ever soooo slowly and reach around and massage or cup his balls (I will dole out extra Brownie points if you look him straight in the eye while doing this) . I just don't know if he'll
last long after that visual cause you intend to use that free hand as such or to play
with your own self while on top!

* For the S&M Inclined: Good moment to consider some light choking/hair
pulling and let loose a few choicy off color remarks! (especially on the slow
pace...you'll see how quick things picks up! LOL)

* If You're Greedy: then maybe you want to place a small/medium pillow under
him and go at it with gusto the added closeness and incline should feel delicious!

* If kissing is what you're after (and aren't we all?): then you might consider a
slight variation on this position and make him sit up (prop him with pillows etc)
and you keep your basic position only this way you can hold on to him and make
out with ease!!

But remember chickies! the main motivator and important word here is CONFIDENCE, you gotta take control and feel all goddessy and ready to put a hurting on that banquet! Otherwise you're going to be too self conscious and shit like that... hazy light close your eyes and ride the pleasure wave with abandon!!! THAT is what is really sexy!

Tah Dah! and Voila ladies and gents Enjoy (and share tips and your views as well as any request in the comments!)